Rules & Rumors
The law of the land, and the lies told about it.
League bylaws
- I
The Buy-In
$50 a head, Venmo the commissioner before the draft. The pot lives in his account so payouts go out the second the season ends. No dues, no draft slot.
- II
The Payouts
Total pot $500. First takes $250, second $150, third $50, and the regular-season crown is worth another $50. $2 to win $500, as the commissioner likes to say.
- III
Keepers
Two keepers. Each costs the pick one round higher than where you drafted him last year, or a 7th-rounder if you grabbed him off free agency. You cannot keep two players with a 1st-round cost; if both keepers share a round, the second bumps up a round.
- IV
The Draft
Live draft, order randomized by the commissioner beforehand. Whenever possible it's done in person — Florida, the Hobbit Hole airbnb, wherever the LOTR sets are on sale.
- V
Trades & Waivers
FAAB waivers run weekly. Every trade is final at acceptance and every trade is, per league tradition, immediately accused of collusion. Double collusion if a Cowboys fan is involved.
- VI
The Punishment
Last place answers for it. The punishment is voted on fresh each season — and yes, it's in quotes. The Graveyard remembers; so does the group chat.